2012

There are so many things I want for this year.  Three months in and already I see and feel them begin to materialize.

I finished the forward to the book/project I’ve been planning to start for…well….too long.  To know that it’s completed and saved to the desktop of my Mac is like knowing I have changed the course of something.

I find myself aligned with the universe and with nature in so many ways right now.  As the clouds begin to lift in New York and the sun creeps out, and I leave our brownstone with just a sweater over my arms and my big round sunglasses on my face…I also feel my body shift.  I’m not sick all day anymore.  Now I can enjoy this little miracle growing inside me.  And during every moment in the day that isn’t occupied by people, or things I am mentally bonding with my child (hand over womb).

Now. Tell me my child doesn't have a REALLY nice head.

Next Saturday I’m cutting my hair.  Not as a sign of “UGH I want change” but as a clean starting point.  My natural roots have grown out and every time I shower and look in the mirror to see these amazing hills and valleys that live on my head only to be weighed down by straightened ends….I just know it’s time tolet go.

The most mitigating change that’s taking place is my last day at work.  Friday I walk out of that building for the very last time and don’t ever have to return.  I allowed that place to represent so much.  My failures, my dependency, my fears.  I took the money gig because I felt I have to, but I know that there are very few things in life we have to do.  I am not that person.  The one sitting at her desk nodding and censoring herself for co-workers, abiding by corporate policy.  Today as I walked through the forest of blue or grey suits and carefully matched Ann Taylor separates in my Target skirt, vintage jewelry and highlighter yellow scarf – my worn in leather loafers clicking against the cold marble floors…I took each loaded glance as a compliment.

  My husband and I are packing our stuff and driving back to our mother-state, California.  I want to chronicle this trip with pictures and video – a project I haven’t yet formulated in my mind completely, but that I want to develop into something amazing.  Our story, the beginning.

More to come!

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70 Days and Counting…

Today my little one is ten weeks along.  I was woken up this morning by one of my pregnancy apps reminding me of the event and listing off all of the amazing progress.  Wiggles has fingernails, a tongue, peach fuzz, and all of it’s vital organs (though not yet fully developed).  It’s the size of a kumquat (approximately 1 1/4 inch long) and weighs something like 0.14 ounces.  Over the next two weeks it will double in size and hopefully give me a break with the nausea as we approach trimester 2.

At 10 Weeks (courtesy of Sprout)

I’ve grown less and less fond of sweet tastes.  When once I was gobbling apples and chocolate almond milk every day, now I can’t stand the taste of it.  Popcorn is a lifesaver and Yogi “Mother-to-Be” tea is my new favorite drink along with Perrier water and grapefruit juice (yum!).  My husband has routed which local stores have which craving must-haves.  Who has the sorbet I like, who has the kale chips, and who has the good juice.  My heart swells with love as he stands up after I mention something that would be “awesome right now” throws on a jacket and grabs his skateboard.  “It’s my job” he reminds me as I apologize for the inconvenience.  He pats my stomach and smiles and I know that he understands.  What a relief to have such a supportive partner!

Although we’re still pretty early along, the days and weeks have begun to pass a bit faster.  It seems like just yesterday my husband and I sat in awe of the two lines glaring back at us and now we’re watching a little tummy-pooch grow (so small only we would notice…I think).  Now when we talk about our future we talk about our baby.  We’ve secured a team of mid-wives, started saving our money and started thinking very seriously about what we want our family to look like.  It’s a growing experience that makes me grateful this little bun takes 9 months to bake.

I won’t be turning this into a pregnancy blog – but it’s a pretty unavoidable topic when you have a person growing inside of you.  I love the feedback I’ve gotten from other mommy-to-be bloggers – please keep it coming!  ❤

We Finally Came Out of the Closet…

After an entire month of loaded silence, we finally announced it to the world yesterday…

🙂

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